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Showing posts from May, 2017

of gratitude and joy.

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Recently, Josh pointed out to me that I tend to complain...a lot. And apparently that's not the nicest thing to be around. As I thought about it (and it didn't take me long), I realized he was completely right. Furthermore, my constant harping made me feel worse and grumpy all the time. So I resolved to make a change.

I started a bullet journal of little things that make me happy. It is literally the smallest act, but after two days I am honestly noticing a difference! The biggest one? Surprise! I feel the spirit more!

As I was thinking about all the things that made me happy today, I meditated on my love of history. One of my lifelong goals is to memorize all 45 (46 if you count Cleveland twice) United States presidents and their cabinets. I fantasized about a future in which I teach history to punk teens who don't really care, but it's all okay because history is amazing. When I think about it long enough, I have dangerous ideas like maybe pursuing even higher educa…

how to have a fight.

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note: this post was not supposed to be NEARLY this sappy, but it just happened, and i'm going to roll with it



Marriage has a learning curve, and I'm always so interested when I think about all the things I have learned about myself and the way I was raised since marrying The Brit.

Josh and I honestly don't fight very often at all, and when we do it's usually when I'm depressed or stressed out. But something I have learned about myself is that I really don't like confrontation. I prefer to run away, roll into a ball, cover my face with a blanket--anything to escape conflict. But you know what is really unhelpful in a long term committed relationship? Escapism, that's what.

I really hate confrontation, but I get a little bit better at it with every day, and I owe it all to Josh. I'm so grateful for the way he gently and patiently tells me what is on his mind and waits for me to go through the 12 stages of grief with every single disagreement. I'm grat…

#blessed

Sometimes the stresses in life pile one on top of another until I am certain I am going to suffocate under the pressure. One by one, over the last few weeks, each of these stresses has been lifted, and it feels SO GOOD TO BREATHE. There came a point last week where we got some good news and I immediately began sobbing, dropped to my knees and thanked my God for watching out for me.

There's nothing like a bitter cold winter to make you bask in the summer sun.

So here's how life is going:

+Josh finished off winter semester really strong! He took some really difficult classes, and we didn't think he was going to pass one of them, which is stressful enough as it is, but when you add the fact that his visa is dependent on his school performance and if he failed he would've been deported... Never have I been so delighted at such a mediocre grade! Josh passed, and he gets to stay in the country! Hurray!

+I started school again after a one-year hiatus, and I was very very anxi…